tips after separation

TAKE CARE OF YOU
Make sure that you’ve got a counsellor/therapist/best friend on speed dial. If there is no fixing the relationship, you need to be sure you take care of yourself and your mental health first a foremost. This is particularly true when there are children involved because parenting is hard enough without the added pressures that separating from a partner brings.

KICS
No that’s not misspelled, just a play on the old KISS acronym. We’re not suggesting you do that either – unless you’re planning on rekindling the flame. Keep It Civil Silly. Well as best you can. If not for your own sanity, but certainly for the sake of any children involved.

WHERE DO YOU GO
If things are amicable and the decision is mutual, discuss separating under one roof until you have all your ducks in a row and you’ve finalised the finer details. Subject to there being any safety concerns, staying in the family home is often the best choice. If you can’t, don’t, safety is your first priority.

THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN
Discuss the children’s routines and who best will be available to keep consistency. You might also consider engaging with a family counselor to assist with any transition to the new normal.

JOINT ACCOUNTS
If there is cash in a joint bank account, and things could get bumpy, remember that you and your ex-spouse have the right to withdraw those funds. If you have enough money to get by, and think the other might get a little ‘handsy’ with joint funds, notify your bank you’ve separated. Ask that withdrawals from the account only be permitted by way of joint signatures.

AVOID THIRD PARTY INTERFERENCE
This includes family, friends and maybe the new partner. Whilst friends and family may help to bandage the wounds after a breakup, avoid using them as a go-between. There are plenty of mediation services available that don’t require friends and family being privy to private matters. And if you’re in a rush to re-partner, until your property settlement is finalised, we suggest you do your best not too. You don’t want your new partner joined to proceedings and your ex asking for their bank statements.

RECORD KEEPING
Just like at tax time, keep a record. Important information to recall are the dates you moved in together and the date you told them it’s all over.

UPDATE YOUR WILL AND SUPERANNUATION BENEFICIARY
Let’s not be morbid, but if you’ve decided to end the relationship you certainly don’t want your ex getting your estate. Remember, your Will doesn’t necessarily direct your superannuation entitlements to form part of your estate.

FURNITURE AND PERSONAL EFFECTS
Things can get nasty when people are emotional. If you’re leaving the family home take the things that you need and certainly anything of sentimental value. Whilst possession isn’t nine-tenths of the law, if your second-hand possessions go up in flames, the court can give you little recourse.

COME MEET OUR DEDICATED FAMILY LAWYERS FOR SOME ADVICE
The above is not an exhaustive list and is a little tongue in cheek for some light entertainment when you’re going through a life hurdle. Our family lawyers are dedicated professionals who can tailor their advice to your needs and circumstances. Make an appointment and get a clear plan of action.

Contact our Family Law team today at enquiries@antunes.com.au or phone us today on 02 9964 0499 to arrange a video conference.

The articles on this website comprise legal general information and not legal advice. The general information presented here must not be relied upon without legal advice being sought. In the event that you wish to obtain legal advice on the contents of this general information you may do so by contacting our office or your existing solicitor.